The High Five

Before the high five, human beings did not have any means of celebrating events as diverse as the completion of a long day of dragging a woman by her hair, the beheading of a king, or the successful humiliation of the nerd in your class, through physical contact with one of his or her friends. But, thanks to the High Five, humans can now conspicuously celebrate in union. Although many big names have employed the high five to express their joy- Borat, Gandhi, T Love (see earlier posts), it was a much bigger name that invented the “five.”

In fact, the High Five traces its origins to Jesus, yes that Jesus. Historians tell HTS that in 31 A.D. Jesus Christ- he of the manger and the cross- gave the first High Five to Lazarus after successfully bringing him back from the dead. Jesus was seen to put his palm in the air, wait for the newly revived Lazarus to copy his arm movement, and then slapped his palm- which resulted in a loud thawk. Jesus then was heard to exclaim, “In your face, Pharisees!”

Note: It may not have been clear before, but now it is apparent….. What would Jesus do? He would give his boy a high five.